30 Days of Perfection: Day 3 ~ Sugar Hangover

Is there such a thing as a sugar hangover? Pretty sure I have one. Yesterday I spent the whole day tired, achy, nauseous, dizzy, and sweaty. I didn’t expect to be sweaty - gross.  I practically had the shakes, and my brain was so foggy I had a hard time forming sentences. Not much better today, forgive me if...what? this entry sucks? I ramble on aimlessly? I don’t make any sense? All of the above - I can’t pick. Hopefully, my body is detoxing and I’ll feel better in another day or two. My only craving for sugar yesterday was medicinal. Just a handful of M&M’s and I’m sure I’d feel better. The thing is, it’s never just one handful. If I open a bag, I’ll be reaching for handfuls until it’s empty.  Instead, I drank a ton of water, and resolved to get through it. So here I am, words fluttering in my head like butterflies I can’t catch. Fucking butterflies. Did I mention I’m a little crabby? 

Despite feeling like a junky in rehab, I did manage to meet my daily goals. Though I cheated a little, and passed the first one off on my husband.

“You’re going to beat me home. When you get there, please tell the kids they need to take a screen break. It’s one of my goals, but I’m too sick to fight. Don’t tell them it’s my idea. I’m not in the mood to be the bad guy.” 

When I walked in the door, I was met with, “The gig is up. They saw right through your ruse. They kept asking me who put me up to it, and I cracked.”

“Really, Mom? Like we’re going to believe a screen break is Dad’s idea. He doesn’t care about that stuff.” 

And there’s the crux of the problem. I’m the only one that worries about how much time the kids spend on screens. I’ve tried setting up all kinds of rules and limits over the years, but nothing works. Most of the plans involve me policing the kids, and after a few days, they wear me down and I give up. I know this is not stellar parenting. In most things, I’m pretty good about being consistent and following through, but not this. Without back up and some level of cooperation from the kids, it’s exhausting. Maybe Mark’s right - we grew up watching TV all the time and we turned out o.k. 

After a tirade of snapping at the kids to do this and that, I escaped to read the chapter I’d said I’d read. Ben came into my room and asked, “What’s going on? Why do you seem so stressed and strict all the sudden?”  I explained about the daily goals and the sugar withdrawal, and why it’s important to me to try and do the things I think I should be doing. “Mom, you do lots of stuff you should do. Maybe this stuff doesn’t matter.” I agreed, maybe it doesn’t, and maybe that’s what I’ll learn this month. 

I also called him out on trying to trick me into giving up on limiting screen time. I do think that matters. To my surprise, he agreed. We talked about the plans we’ve tried before, and which one Ben thought was most likely to work. They can have screens for an hour after they get home to unwind, and then from 7:00 to 9:00. That leaves about three hours for dinner, homework, and other activities. O.k. we’ll try it again. “Mom, you just have to make us do it. Don’t give up after a few days. We’ll get used to it.” Good advice. Ben has a reputation for being an old man in a boy's body. 

Day Three

Family: start new screen plan

Friends: buy and send a card I’ve been meaning to send

Work: do the laundry

(Can I do ALL the laundry in one day? I’m not making any promises, but I’ll give it a shot.)

Writing: work on revisions on something to read at Writing Group on Friday

Habits: don’t procrastinate

Whole Health: list 5 things I’m grateful for 

P.S. Who are these people?  

Mark - husband of 20 years

Luke - 15 year old son (Luke has autism.  It doesn’t define him, but knowing that information helps in understanding our story)

Ben - 12 year old son